Its been awhile since my last post. It’s harder when there’s so much on your mind and of course, with all the craziness that is smothering the hours of daily life.

In the past week, five bag of oreos later, 15 pds added, I reflected on past situations and came to realise they are what they are. There’s absolutely no way of changing the past but you can most definitely make the present/future better.

What’s on my mind right now?

I keep thinking sometimes I really do not appreciate what is in front of me…and to the cliche, I do end up regretting that I didnt value what I had when I had it. Maybe…I thought myself too important…that this person, this thing, this whatever it might be would never dare to leave me. But I was wrong. Does it hurt? Yes.

A conversation among friends told me that we live in a world we sometimes create for ourselves. What do I mean? I mean sometimes we play a role, we act/live in a way that is not to our liking because were so afraid to live the way we want. Like a friend said, “I’m alive but not living”. I have friends who want to do more but make excuses not too. Some of them wants to find love but locks themselves up in 4 walls. Some don’t have the courage to travel, or to further themselves. Some…truly live a lie…

Ok…short post.

Some girls annoy the crap out of me…why?

Those Girls: “sighs* I can’t fit into this…I can’t fit into that, it’s a thyroid problem so it’s hard to lose weight…no likes me coz I’m fat…I try but it’s so hard… I think I just lost a job coz I don’t look like them. Slow down! I’m tired from walking (after 15mins, wtf). How come this doesn’t come in my size *picks up this hot backless dress* (I’m imaging rolls)? How come this…how come that…..why no man wants me…

Ok…stop freaking feeling sorry about ur damn self and go do something about it. JEEZ. Whose damn fault is it that you can’t fit into a “large” anymore? I know it’s not mines…  I have no problems against big girls coz I consider myself to be one too but it’s those big girls that pick at themselves and victimizes themselves over and over. I know people with thyroid problems and still manage to lose weight or maintain their size. I highly doubt stuffing yourself with 4 cinnabons (about 800 calories each) is gonna make things any better. Just because the food looks small, it doesn’t mean that that it’s not fattening. Then this whole thing with “Well I don’t wanna really date coz I’m big…you know…..” No! I don’t know…except I hear about it all the damn time! Yea…sure you don’t want to date…but inside, you want to find that nice guy to date…com’ on! Who are you lying to??? I see the jealous glint in your eyes whenever we head out…And believe me it’s hard to date anyone being stuck in four walls everyday….I mean who are you going to meet? Oh wait! I know, wall #1… wall#2….and so on. Not all men look at size but they sure look for confidence… and a lot of these chicks have so little of it… “I won’t fit into this” It’s called ‘dieting’. I could sure lose a few pounds, I admit I do not like my arms or my back, but other than that I know I look good. I have a friend and she is a pretty looking big girl and she rock her size like it’s nothing and men would flock to her. And you’re so picky! Almost 50 and you only want white blue eyed blond men and they have to be young….I mean jeez…you need to think of it this way….if you dont want someone outside that standard, there is a chance those men might not want you either.

SO in short, learn to be confident in your size or do something about it because victimizing yourself everyday makes you look like a damn sad bitch.

If you really know me…then you should know that I’m a very blunt person and anything I say here has been said to the individual directly….so I am not talking about this person behind their back…let the story begin…oki???

We’ll call this friend “Tara”

Tara is what you can call the “seek attention girl” (and “Tara” if you’re reading this, you know its true). She is a bit older than me, always on the prowl for love….any type of love (this is not funny to me at all). Let’s start with January 2010, ok?

I was invited to her home for her Bday party (I knew no one there besides her and the two roommates). She was waiting for one particular person….lets call him….”Adam”. Tara was dating…well actually sleeping with Adam on and off….he was still married….(I think)….So I chatted with the friends that arrived. At first Tara was the hostess, offering drinks and whatnot until….”FG” arrived and we were like “oh…ok…so this is the guy she was talking about” (Yes…people…..you’re prolly thinking…what?…I thought it was Adam? Well….I was wrong too….=P)….and then…Adam arrived…and then more men arrived….and the friends and I looked at each other and murmured… “Um….did she really invite her ‘booty calls’ to her bday party???? It was completely awkward…especially when I became hostess as she clung to Adam all night…. (later on she actually ditched me in the club for HIM where I was attacked/bitten by a cape verdean..=/ )….

She later ran to the bathroom and cried and told me that FG and Adam wanted to get to know me (I’ll maybe do FG…but Adam…??? You’re joking right?) I’ll blog about FG and me later… Do you wanna know why they were attracted to me? Because I was doing my own thing…having fun meeting people…I was not slobbering over a man that prolly didnt really care about me….Her party was SHORT-LIVED….ended in two hrs…and then we hitted the club (she really didnt even want to go….she wanted to stay home and fcuk Adam)…at this point Adam tried touching me or whatever (wouldnt that tell you that he’s a piece of shit?)… Sidenote: She actually even told her friends and employees that I was trying to steal ADAM from her …..what a joke! I would never touch that crap. Her employee actually told me about it later..much later…(how can you sit there and try to make me look bad when you slept with someone I really cared about and not tell your other friends that you did that?) Even her friend gave me this weird look months after and I couldnt figure out why but now I do….Look…your Adam is a whore…not me! Then she became so sad when Adam stopped calling her….ignoring her…blah blah…I told her it was not worth it…and I thought she’d moved on….

THEN THERE WAS “Andrew”

Andrew is a friend of mines (I’ll avoid too much details about him). Andrew is a really nice guy…prolly not really good in relationships but is a  good friend and I’m thinking, “Hey….I mean Tara doesnt want a relationship and Andrew doesnt want one…maybe they can still have fun?” LOL, I know ‘pimping’ him out…lol. He DOES NOT want a relationship…at all…but she fell for him too….This story was also short lived….with many NONORGASMIC BANSHEE SCREAMING tales….(I think I have that face…that just SCREAMS “I can trust her with all my secrets” and believe or not…I do…therefore….not all of the details will be put out there). There is the secret of the valentine’s day flowers…..

Oooo…..The Tam’s Bartender…lets’s call him “TAM”

Somewhere during the time period of Andrew, Adam, Fg…Tam came along…(why am I in these adventures??? I wish I knew!!!)…Tam is a bartender that works at the The Tams in DT Boston…I guess she met him a couple of time and they hit it off sometime during NYE….Sidenote:Ooooo Sean!!! lol…ok…so she went on a date with him….and bedded him the same night…… and she couldnt figure out why he was BUSY all the TIME….

Tara: I keep texting him and calling him and I have no clue why he’s so busy all the time.

ME: Um….maybe with school or whatever, right? Maybe you should just move on…

Tara: I know he likes me though….We’re so good in bed together….

Me: Um….well then ask him what’s good?

Tara: Ok!

………………Do you guys really want to know what he said……………..This is what I remember…

TAM: LOOK….I havent call you for a reason…..0-o……..

In short….he didnt think of her as anything more than a booty call…..

So how many was that already? Four??? To be continued…….

Random thoughts as my first blog entry:

I’ve always felt when writing a blog, your thoughts should be raw and uninhibited. Of course, no one really wants to offend anyone (there are exceptions), but your writing should reflect the person that you are. Otherwise, you’ll start sounding like those wannabe fake individuals that wants their readers to like just them, you’ll sound dry, dull, dead…..again fake….

My blog will consist mostly of my mini adventures, the crazy stories of my friends (all names will be changed to save them from humiliation lol =) ), what I see, hear, or find interesting….I’ll keep politics minimal. What I write could be entertaining, offensive, crazy, etc  but my purpose to keep my memories stored in place where I can later read and laugh about it and to of course allow my readers to have something entertaining to read about when they are bored, sad, or whatever. So…enjoy. =)